My boats are rotting
July 23, 2010

Another week where the wind blew a little too much for our little boats. A friend and neighbor sank his during the Barta event last Friday, so I shouldn't complain. I decided that if it ever gets below 5 knots both Bobby and I are going to call in sick....actually he has to go to a "conference" that day; I'll be sick.

Busy week at work and on the social calendar as well; had my nephew and his girlfriend over for dinner one night this week, good time and good food, wahoo on the grill, yummy. Jackson and I played golf one evening (he's getting much better, might need to rein him in a bit so that he doesn't get too good), and last night we finally went to our first Marlins game. Fun time, it was PAWS night for the local pet adoption agency; we came home with 6 dogs and a couple of dozen cats. It's always fun to adopt those animals and then come home and turn them loose again; I think it keeps the PAWS people busy and provides them with job security. We did keep one cat for a special Cantonese dish we're trying tonight.

Off to Sanford tomorrow for Keelyn's baptism and Cooper's 4th birthday party. We're looking forward to spending time with friends and family. Pictures of the celebrations next week, I promise.

Oh and yes, I was just kidding about the pets. I know, I shouldn't joke about serious issues like that; it's not a Cantonese dish................ it is Szcheuan. Sorry.

July 16, 2010
Toy Story 3

With Jackson in Nashville for the national FBLA meeting we had a sneak preview of the empty nest we will experience in a few weeks. Terri had double-time Dink duty and I had plenty to do all week, so I don't think we fully comprehended what this will be like, but it is the next step, so we look forward to seeing him in football camp August 12th.

Last Sunday the three of us got in the yellow boat along with two inflatable chaise lounge chairs, my 9' surfboard, a Dale Earnhardt cooler full of cold beverages, and a fishing rod. Off we went to the big sand bar near the AB bridge. our neighbors acting as thought they didn't know us; I guess our appearance of wealth and culture must have intimidated them. Ba-boom, get that one? Anyway we had fun although we found out the surfboard apparently had shrunk from non-use the past couple of years. After playing around for a long time off we went to let Terri do her bow rail bunny pose as we toured past the Morehead waterfront. Jackson showed his pride during this parade by putting his towel over his head!

Which brings us back to Toy Story 3. We went to see the movie last Saturday and enjoyed it. My older brother looks like Woody, or one of the Village People, can't decide which. I don't have the panda, but the dog is in my office closet....minus a little hair.

Going to Raleigh to see Jay and his crew tomorrow, welcome Jackson home after church Sunday, and then find a flattering picture of the birthday girl (niece K-girl). In town all next week, and then off to Sanford for Keelyn's baptism, and Cooper's birthday party.

July 9, 2010
Not the best of weeks

Went to Raleigh for the 4th, to Sanford for Jay's birthday, and then to OH, WV, MD, and VA. Got home Friday afternoon after struggling with the Suburban all week. The darn thing keeps turning off, some of the time in a straight line with no traffic, other times NOT. It was a little scary at times, and really messed me up for the week and wasted a lot of time.

But I did make it home in one piece so we are getting ready for a nice relaxing weekend. Sorry this wasn't funnier but I'm in a foul mood.

30th birthday? How did that happen?
July 2, 2010

It goes by fast! Happy birthday to Jay, 30 years old on 7/05/10. Seems like yesterday (insert dreamlike audio and wavy video) that I was holding him on my lap; now I don't remember having a lap. He was a good boy and now a great adult, husband, father and son. Thanks buddy.Now as for that little brother of yours'..........................................

We are going to a 3rd of July party at the Weinholds tomorrow, and then off to Sanford and Raleigh Sunday. Monday afternoon Terri will come home and I'm off to OH and WV for work. We're looking forward to getting away for a night.

Which leads me to the next photo from the annuals of history. Feel free to insert caption here. I'll get it started

"where did you come from, a scotch ad?"

Have a good week and act like somebody

June 25, 2010
Funny pictures

Funny ha-ha, not funny queer. Decided to go with a lighter touch this week; and without as much foul language and content. Hope you find these shots amusing:

One of my favorite pictures of Jackson when he was going through his "sniper" stage. He built this structure in our front yard in Sanford, and would sit in it waiting to pick off an unsuspecting enemy officer at any time. Although his kill ratio wasn't that good I can honestly say he kept Al-Qaeda off Shannon Drive effectively. The "sniper" stage came after his "burglar" phase. He kept us entertained with his imagination; I'm going to miss him when he goes to school in August. Football practice begins two weeks before school starts, so he will get a head start on other incoming freshmen.

I gained brownie points a few weekends ago by helping Terri clean out her office at White Oak Elementary. OK, I wasn't so much physical help as it was morale encouragement as I read children's books while she packed up; but I did open the door while she lugged the heavy boxes to the car. Anyway, while going through her books I found two Gideon New Testaments just like the ones you received as a child. Feeling a little cynical I challenged why these were in a public school and not the Koran. Hearing no verbal answer; just "sign language" indication my number one status with her, I decided to open the Bible to find out to whom it belonged.

What followed kind of reminds me when they found the words "Clinton Sucks" written in snow on the White House lawn in the 90's. The Secret Service told Clinton that it was written in urine, and that analysis indicated it was Al Gore's urine. Clinton laughed it off as a harmless prank until they told him it was Hillary's handwriting. Oh, forgot I was going to keep it clean this week, sorry. Anyway, I looked at the attached photo inside the Good Book; I think it's Jay's handwriting. Wonder if he will fess up? Must have caught him on a disagreeable day. Anyway, funny picture # 2

And yes Kevin, I remember the Weiner King in Roanoke Rapids, or as I like to call it "Chernobyl." Your father and I camped in the back of his truck on the Chowan River for a few days fishing, and I guess I was a little backed up from all of the beanie weenies, Vienna sausages, sardines, and Budwis..........I mean Pepsis. After visiting the accommodations at the Weiner King in Roanoke Rapids on the way home, they not only closed the restaurant, they razed the building. Supposedly the dirt from the foundation was transported to be used as landfill at Three Mile Island; you know the part that glows in the dark? Odd they still praise Beethoven's Third Movement from Moonlight Sonata some 200 years later, but I never hear anything about mine........................and it was historical. Sorry, forgot again that I was going to keep this clean.

Another graduation picture; this is especially funny as Rod was just given the estimated cost of 4 years' out of state tuition in California! Staci is one of the neatest young ladies I've ever known, and I know she will do well at whatever she attempts.

And lastly, a funny comic strip from last week. Argyle Sweater is close to The Far Side in offbeat humor so you know I like it. Those of you who know how much I enjoy interpretive dance, especially at church, and sometimes with partial nudity; will know why this was so funny to me. Dangit, forogt I was going to keep this clean(er).

Oh well, I'll try again next week.... I promise.

June 18, 2010
Rest In Peace Mudbone

We lost a good one this week; John Taylor passed away Monday night in Rocky Mount. He was not only a good friend and husband to my cousin, but truly someone with whom you always had fun; whether he was telling you a Richard Pryor story for the 50th time, or giving sage advice. We relied on him much more than we could ever thank him for helping with our parents, especially over the past few years. Betty Ruth and John were in Morehead last week to chauffeur Dink to Jackson's graduation, and again, we truly enjoyed their company. I can not remember ever being with John when I didn't enjoy his slightly offbeat and off color point of view, and usually with sore sides from laughing so hard. There is a big hole in my heart; he will be missed.

So I looked for a good picture of John, and decided on this one from his Facebook page. I like it for its simplicity; it looks like John is just sitting there waiting for the next bus; which I guess is what he has figuratively been doing this week.

During John's funeral one of the pastors asked forgiveness for doing something that might be a bit different for a funeral service. He said that if we were not willing to forgive him then we were welcome to leave right then. Therefore in John's memory, the humor in this blog is going to get a little rougher than normal, so I suggest that if you can not forgive my indiscretion in John's memory, then you should perhaps surf on over to another web site right now. Might I suggest www.screwyouifyoucanttakeajoke.com

FYI, I cleaned that joke up for you prudes

And, you are welcome to participate in the fun; there will be audience participation later.

On to other events; Jay and family were here last weekend; here is a shot of Cooper at the wheel of Nana's boat.

And a shot of Jackson a couple of years ago, notice any resemblance? Cooper's orange hat is a hand-me-down from his father to Jackson and now to Cooper. Years ago we would let our boys wander around Duke football games with that same hat on; no matter where they went in the stands we always knew where they were.
Cooper later petered out, and was doing this at 25 knots. Don't know if he's going to have salt in his blood or not, but we're trying.
Are you still there? Speaking of petering, OK, time for audience participation; insert your caption here.

Also from Pennsylvania, another funny sign. I've made a few of these, but never considered cooking with the energy generated by a few Heineken's, some pinto beans and onions; or whatever your personal magic recipe is. Again, any more ideas on captions are welcome.

So that's it from here on that old eastern shore. Get your red cups and Sharpies out, next week is Beach Week for the in-laws. OK, last chance to insert your caption here also. Terri has a seminar scheduled (how did she do that?) Should be real

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fun

Don't forget to insert your own captions, and next week I'll clean it up a little, maybe

June 12, 2010
Oh what a week!

It was a great week indeed as we celebrated our young man's graduation and enjoyed a lot of time with friends and family.
Monday night we co-hosted a party at the Cader home on North River. What a view of Harkers Island and the light house. All of the kids had fun, and from what I saw the adults did as well.

One special guest was our new granddaughter Keelyn Marie Riley; ever so coy and demure as she went to her first big time party Friday night; the Keli Wagner Lady Anglers Party at our civic center. By all social accounts she was the belle of the ball.
Graduation !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now for some long awaited video; Jackson acts as cool as cool can get; listen carefully and you'll hear someone yell at him to "LOOKUPHERE" (3 Amigos joke, I'm thinking 3 of you will get that)

And then the silly string begins; there was so much that the offensive odor was really strong even up where we were sitting. Or at least that is my story and by all acouunts I stuck to it.

And then it was time to REALLY party, and dance like it is 1999, or something like that. Now I promised the young lady in this video that I would not put it on YouTube with her name on it, and I haven't. But after the week we've had I can't help but show it here, and use it to celebrate a wonderful time. Enjoy, and no no no you teetotalers out there, no alcohol was used to stimulate this dance of happiness; a wonderful lady having a wonderful time on a wonderful night!

(video removed after dramatic family pressure.awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww)

Off to PA (yuk, Sunday travel) in PA, NJ, MD and VA through Wednesday